Alive.
Hi. So I'm alive. What's up, huh? Corona. Backdoor government and a few other things. We were asked to stay home and quarantine ourselves. I literally have no problem with that. I guess I've been that way since forever. Only meet my friend once a week, I prefer to stay at home. But I do love to go out, walking and just appreciating the world. But not with people. One or two, yeah. So, no problemo. Despite RMO, I still gotta work. This gal got a mouth to feed.
Lately, I've been looking for my old acquaintances from primary school to secondary school and college. I see their lives are great. Mine is just fine. I owe them apologies. The thing is, I was lost. Hold on, this is not me trying to justify myself. Rather to tell you that I never find who I am. Till this day. When in primary school, I was a bitter kid, with three friends who end up hated me. I don't blame them. I would hate me too. I was also not an intellectual and what you call "pick-me-girl" these days. I also was in a silly relationship because my crush didn't like me back. Standard 6 was a hectic year. Also, I skipped school for the first time in my life and I assure you I'm not the bad influence here. I want to apologize to my friends who I hurt in my time in that school. You know who you are. I would mention your name, but the list is very long.
High school. The downfall of my confidence. I know I'm not your type of beauty standard. I'm just me. There I met queen bees, jocks, jerks, nerds and more. I became one of them. I also met my best friends there. I became one of the prefects. There are mean girls fought with me. I broke down. I lashed out. I made terrible decisions (I always do). I lost myself trying to fit in. I can't stand up for myself. Fought with best friends. Acting like a bratty immature kid. I finally know how it feels being in the bottom of society of high school. But my two friends stay with me, until now. Altough they are not, you know, really close to each other. Like they are two completely different people who happened to be my friend. Good news, I scored my SPM.
College. Form 6. I regret for not spending the years wisely. I lost myself again. I just abandon my high school friends. I was friends with this girl and she was kinda toxic. The list is horrible. Fought every semester. I had to forget my principles.I just totally lost myself.
Point is, I hurt people. I want to apologize. For hurting everyone. I want to move on. And I apologized to every people who shame me, bullied me and hurt me. Y'all still thriving anyway. Yeah, I'm sorry.
Also, I reconnected with my best friends back, after the third sem I fought with that girl. I appreciate them more now. I love you gals.
Anyway, stay home. stay safe.
Lately, I've been looking for my old acquaintances from primary school to secondary school and college. I see their lives are great. Mine is just fine. I owe them apologies. The thing is, I was lost. Hold on, this is not me trying to justify myself. Rather to tell you that I never find who I am. Till this day. When in primary school, I was a bitter kid, with three friends who end up hated me. I don't blame them. I would hate me too. I was also not an intellectual and what you call "pick-me-girl" these days. I also was in a silly relationship because my crush didn't like me back. Standard 6 was a hectic year. Also, I skipped school for the first time in my life and I assure you I'm not the bad influence here. I want to apologize to my friends who I hurt in my time in that school. You know who you are. I would mention your name, but the list is very long.
High school. The downfall of my confidence. I know I'm not your type of beauty standard. I'm just me. There I met queen bees, jocks, jerks, nerds and more. I became one of them. I also met my best friends there. I became one of the prefects. There are mean girls fought with me. I broke down. I lashed out. I made terrible decisions (I always do). I lost myself trying to fit in. I can't stand up for myself. Fought with best friends. Acting like a bratty immature kid. I finally know how it feels being in the bottom of society of high school. But my two friends stay with me, until now. Altough they are not, you know, really close to each other. Like they are two completely different people who happened to be my friend. Good news, I scored my SPM.
College. Form 6. I regret for not spending the years wisely. I lost myself again. I just abandon my high school friends. I was friends with this girl and she was kinda toxic. The list is horrible. Fought every semester. I had to forget my principles.I just totally lost myself.
Point is, I hurt people. I want to apologize. For hurting everyone. I want to move on. And I apologized to every people who shame me, bullied me and hurt me. Y'all still thriving anyway. Yeah, I'm sorry.
Also, I reconnected with my best friends back, after the third sem I fought with that girl. I appreciate them more now. I love you gals.
Anyway, stay home. stay safe.
